Recently, the folks at Absolut Vodka revived their Absolut Cities campaign from the 1980s. And one of the first cities they've honored with a flavored vodka of its own is Los Angeles. It's a tasty mixture of vodka with "acai, acerola, pomegranate and blueberry." But what's really interesting about it, for locals, is the perception of Los Angeles – and how variant it is from the reality.

According to the Absolut web site: "Absolut Los Angeles [is] a tribute to a city that inspires so many…It will take your senses behind the scenes for an exclusive taste of the City of Angels, and inspire you to dream big and reach for the stars." Further, we're told that the vodka is, "a unique and innovative blend of flavors, just like the city itself…a nod to the city's trendy, environmentally forward, and health-conscious ideals..."

Which is lovely; indeed, it's downright utopian. But it seems to miss the flavors that we Angelenos taste on an average day. Where, for instance, is the smog – which may be the defining Flavor of Los Angeles. What does it taste like to be stuck on the San Diego Freeway at 5 o'clock on a Friday afternoon – a bit of bile perhaps, or just a general sense of regret? How about a few flavor notes that reflect our wild and wonderful ethnic mix – perhaps a hint of guacamole and salsa, just a bit of Vietnamese fish sauce, a dash of hoisin and wasabi? Now, that would be a real taste of Los Angeles – and it could be made into a cocktail with a garnish of torn-to-shreds parking ticket; those parking enforcement folks do leave a taste in your mouth, and not a good one.